here’s the thing…

August 5th, 2011 § Leave a Comment

In order for anyone to have an adult conversation, we must each own up to our own emotional ups and downs. If we held other people responsible for our uncomfortable emotions and credit them for the good-feeling emotions, we will always be lost. It is so easy to fall into the victim role when we do that. How could we ever find ourselves when we are the victims of other people’s actions and words? It is only understandable when a young child acts out and kicks the rock that trips him. As an adult, we reel back the responsibility and communicate and work with the outside world to take care of ourselves.

Why do people always say, “grow up” when we fight with each other? What does that mean? What is expected? To me, it means to take responsibility for our own emotional reactions, express truly without losing respect. It does not mean to be 100% agreeable and yielding, but open to hearing the other side, being empathic about where the other person’s coming from without compromising your own truth. Yes, it is tricky. Human relations have always been. I am always here to talk and listen, but if anyone is going to throw a temper tantrum when I refuse to be responsible for their emotions, I will no longer tolerate that. Not now, not ever again.

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